HELP ME......

He dont want to hear me.................
adoh mau nangis rasanya.....
gue lebih baik disakitin deh, daripada nyakitin orang............
aduh....................
gmana dunk........?????

begini ceritanya....
belakangan ini gue lagi deket sama seseorang..
dia baik..., humoris, smart and do care to me...
Actually he had asked me to goin in deeper relationship..
and I asked moment to think...
2 month...
2months later, i will give the answer.

rencananya dua bulan itu akan gue gunakan untuk mengenal dia lebih jauh
untuk try to open my heart....
untuk tau lebih dalam ttg dia...
untuk tau how to make him satisfied
and untuk make sure that he will be the last ( I hope )

Honestly....
I started to think about him...
I start to care about him....
and I start to pray about him...

gue minta Tuhan buka jalan, kasih gue hikmat dan sign if he the right one for me...
and tiba2 aja muncul dipikiran gue buat nanya " do you believe in God?"

and u know.......
the answer is NO.......
OMG... oh my....oh No...
He only believe that wat he got just because of his effort..

wuah... pupuslah harapan...
and gue langsung kasih tau ke dia, supaya kita ga lanjutin masa PDKT ini lagi..
karena gue takut kalo nanti dia tambah sayang ma gue
sedangkan gue tetep ga akan jalan ma dia karena kita da beda persepsi pada awalnya.

Gue cuma ga mau booing dia..............
please say to him that i dunt want to hurt him.......
daripada ntar gue and dia uda saling sayang and ternyata gue baru bilank...
skenario palink buruknya siy...
kalo gue bertahan tahunan ma dia, and we are goin to married but.....
have to separate because of this matter...
gmana donk????

tapi... yah.... reaksinya ketika gue bilang gt....
yah... begitu dah...
gue jadi merasa seperti ORANG PALING JAHAT DI DUNIA
aduh...
jadi serba salah....

yah... ga papa deh marah...
emang dah sewajarnya dia marah.....
wajar kalo dia jadi kesel and benci ma gue....
tapi.. marahnya jangan lama - lama yah...
kita temenan aja yah.....

hik...hik... (adoh... gue masih berasa bersalah niyh)
depi... pue,.... amel...., laura..... dev.... help me..........